The First.

Well, this is my first time to write a blog – oops! too cliché. Actually, this is not my first time to have a blog because I have one in Tumblr, but since I’ve been interested in one of the blogs found here, I decided to start one too. Thanks to Mr. Phim for inspiring me to continue this long-forgotten hobby of mine, but I just want to warn you guys that I’m not a good lay-out designer, so please bear with me while I’m working on it.

First Love?

Moving on, I bet that many of us have and had been in love in some point of their lives, and as for me, I have been deeply in love. In fact, I revolved my world around him – and I regret it – but I was young and he was my firsts. I hope you sort of get me in a way or two, right? I was his firsts too, no doubt, but will it matter to us right now that we’re apart? No. It will just be a memory for us because we will have our seconds, though I’m not telling that I already have, but we have to face the fact that there might be. Before, I thought that he will be my first and my last, guess I was wrong, though we still don’t know what will happen with us in the future. It’s just nice to keep your hopes up without expectations because expectations can kill you. Plus, don’t let your hopes keep you from doing the thing you can enjoy now – how will you know the right one if you’re holding back to those around you or even every people you meet? I should say: There’s no right one, unless the right time comes.

I can’t believe it. I’m saying these things even if what I did before was exactly the opposite. Believe it or not, I limited my conversations with other guys because of him even though I know they’re just my friends and even though we’re not together anymore. If before, I was just parking my car, now I’m on the road again, and it wouldn’t be possible if someone didn’t help me get the engine started – Coi. I hope he will not be able to read this, since he still doesn’t know what he had done for me. Good thing I went camping this semester break because I met that cool dude there. I just had a thought in my mind: “Maybe he’s the reason why I was so enticed to attend this year’s camp, though I had doubts too at first.” Well now, I can say that I crossed my comfort zone which was him and managed to mingle with people especially guys without that holdback feeling. These things really gave me a big sigh of relief, so ladies and gentlemen, whether you agree with me or not, absolutely, things happen for wonderful reasons.

There’s nothing better than the first time – sometimes.

Maffay :)